idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
you are the weird ass hat to my lady gaga
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I have started doing my homework in bars. It just feels right.
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
I'm sorry. I know you didn't expect me to be arm deep in vagina when you walked through the door.
We need to reprogram your vagina to say "no"
SURVIVAL MODE. WE CAN DO THIS. Celebratory survived-working-christmas-retail sex to follow
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I like it here so far, only people are a lot less accepting of my terrible decisions and it's cramping my style
I just walked by a dude at the gym covering himself in olive oil.
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