I can't remember if we talked about feelings. Fuck you Miller High Life.
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
So that wine I told you about is vile...
That the stuff you brewed in your dorm closet? Are you actually going to drink it?
Yup. It's drinkable. Might go blind, but I've got to use my chemistry minor for something.
gorilla chasing a banana on crotch rockets. Halloween is getting way too real
Who replies to a drunk text at 6am that's like against the rules of being a designated drunk text receiver
He showed up at my door at 3 AM wearing a Santa hat with a tiara attached.
I'm reliable. I always make it home. I always throw up in the street too.
just got caught singing "pop that pussy" by a very old man at work. *face palm*
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Go have fun. I'm gonna go shower off the regret.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Randomize
