i've decided to use this saturday afternoon to take care of my pube situation
Talking about the game in the closet with a banana wearing sunglasses.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Just because you can put your penis in it does not make it "good stuff".
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Dude for real though, we gotta stop getting hammered and kissing gay guys.
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
WE ARE DOOMED.
And not the good kind of doomed. Assuming there is one.
it isn't the robot apocalypse that's for sure
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
Randomize