is it considered a "problem" when you find a pickle slice in your bed in the morning or is it like a "super-awesome bonus"?
i'm at the gym and so are four guys who have seen my tits. i need winter break.
yeah, and then after the convo was clearly over, my dad decides to scream "SIZE MATTERS" just to make things even more uncomfortable.
I just can't bring boyfriends home.
he sent me a picture of his dick with a heart border around it
You told me when we were leaving the club if I could pin point your nipple through your padded bra you would show me if I was right.
We followed the campus tour around in a golf cart drinking PBR and blasting "Sexual Healing."
found a cell phone. in the freezer. wrapped in bologna. explain?
I just threw up trying to put pants on. This is obviously a sign to stay naked.
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
Did I leave the house with out a shirt or socks?
Yea, you said you didn't need them cause she was going to take them off anyways and that it would "save time".
If he's gonna send me dick pics; he should at least zoom in to make it look bigger.
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
I have decided that I would still fuck Harrison Ford even though he is old as fuck now. Do you think it would kill him?
Most likely. But I bet he'd do a bang up job of it before he died.
He absolutely would.
She shouldn’t care what consenting adults do behind closed doors
You do realize it was her husband you were hooking up with behind that door, right?
Randomize
