am i morally bankrupt?
no. its just the recession
Not gonna happen. She just told me she puts glitter over the mole on her nose to make it look like a piercing.
okay so i know you are missing your wallet but at least its not your tooth. i am missing my tooth.
the girl in my class has a rolling backpack and just told it to stay. im too hungover for this.
no i decided against it. savin my coke binge for finals week.
Maybe it's cuz you slapped him with a pancake last night
I just had to MC for a middle school event with jizz on my dress. I'm going to hell.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
We really have to stop convincing people tazing is the cool thing to do.
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
Okay well we need to be adults. We're gonna end up with diabetes or some shit.
Telling the family you're going for a run, getting dressed in workout clothes, and then walking halfway around the block and smoking a joint. This is my life
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
Randomize
