He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Sitting in class thinking wow im glad im not hungover...and then i realized im still drunk.
it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
why isn't there a fb relationship option that says 'still banging my ex'
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
Don't feel bad, we're professionals and we just housed burgers in burger king singing I believe I can fly
I paused the movie when the delivery guys arrived, and while they were assembling the bed, one of the guys pointed to the tv and said "why so serious?" And it made the whole experience happy.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
Nothing says "First Single Holidays" quite like getting baked with the guy that took your virginity four years ago.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
I miss you and I miss your weed. Come home.
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