You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
I can't believe believe she called me a slut. She doesn't know anything about me or my life.
Shit, that's something a lot of sluts say.
Scream out, "Tax-Free dick over here" in the bar. Ladies love tax free stuff
I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
I'm sorry for the crack den comment. You have a lovely apartment.
And this is weird.. I feel slightly less depressed after shitting myself.
I woke up to a bag of pies and a lot of questions
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
He said it was fake. Like really? Hey baby, I wanna sleep with you, so here's a picture of a fake tiny dick
I literally got so drunk last night, I texted myself "porpoises" and that was it. I have no recollection of this.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I pretended to be blind and he pretended to be my assistant and long story short, we had to buy that bra and panty set, and now we're both banned from Victoria's Secret AND I have a cum stained demi cup.
Fun FACT Saturday: Semen is great for my acid reflux
My books smell like weed. What does that tell you about my college experience?
Thumbs up
The same idiot-bubble, now just bigger and louder.
Randomize
