Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
You tried to initiate "Occupy McDonald's" when the cashier didn't give you enough ketchup.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
lesson learned. Never drop acid before a trip to the aquarium. Sounds awesome, is actually terrifying.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
Yo I get this girl alone in my room last night but she bounces cus she thought the full house poster was "weird"
I'm at a loss. By loss I mean singing songs from Wicked and pretending I'm at the Oscars
Just heard him in the middle stall. Sounded like someone emptied a toolbox into the toilet.
The guy who said he's gonna suck your butthole till your face caves in is at Maggie's
Hey, is this going to be a real date, or am I just meeting you at a hotel to have sex in the bathroom? Given our history, I think it's a fair question.
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
We could just stay sober.
No! We tried that once.
It sucked.
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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