I don't get it.
Me neither.
But I masturbated to it anyway.
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
I woke with a ring of glitter around my dick.... I kinda don't want to wash it off
mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
i have learned 4:30 is too early to start pregamming for the midnight harry potter
My dad just decided to play wingman for me... I dont want to let the family down... but both these girls are hideous
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
You have not lived until you've puked on your sequined UGGs in the Rite Aid parking lot while going to buy emergency contraceptives.
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
STOP GETTING GIRLS PREGNANT IN MY BED.
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
Randomize
