I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
you hand the children out the window. i'll pour the drinks.
Definately going to wake up wondering what happened to the other half of my lip.
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
I made him recite stats from the playoffs game last night before I would go down on him.
good news: I made it out of bed and into shower. Bad news: I made it back to bed without clothes. Worse news: I don't know this bed.
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
I'm not entirely sure that the guy that just texted me is not on drugs right now. I'm also not entirely sure that he isn't about to be incarcerated.
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
Well. I had to explain to my niece that the word cunt is not an abbreviation for country. I'm the best aunt in the world.
I frew up on some kids lovely sidealk chald drawings..
Just had a small freak out because I couldn't get my bra unhooked and thought I was gonna be stuck in it forever.
Randomize
