She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm praying to Jesus, Allah, Buddah,and the whole gang tonight that I'm not pregnant
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
Doctor took one look at my penis and said, 'you don't have herpes, you just masturbate too much'
i have rugburns grass stains and some road rash. im an all terrain slut
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
I wanna take him on a special date, something that says I banged your brother but since he moved I want you
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
official rule: if your drunk, it doesn't count
then nothing in my life counts
I'm making him come over again tonight. I don't know how long this thing will last so I want to spend as much time with his dick as possible.
I asked her why she named her vibrator Lorenzo and said it was the name she started screaming her first time.
I just swiped right for a guy on Tinder solely because it looked like he was holding Zoboomafoo
well true... there's not a real discreet way to masturbate in public
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
Randomize
