You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
why do the even put the "Please drink responsibly" on tequila ads? like has anything responsible ever come from tequlia. No. never.
Yeah getting kicked out of the bar at 1 pm really set the tone for the day.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
DUDE, DID YOU KNOW YOU CAN JUST RENT AN ELEPHANT???
Oh God.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
It all started with sending him a text about Spongebob. It escalated from there.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
ya well i woke up to my roommate spraying me with windex...
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