Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
He made a note in his iPhone tonight so that he would remember that I rejected him.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
I apologize for excluding you. On a better note: the stripper that made out with my wife friend requested me on facebook
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
proof that my night is going well: I can still open doors
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I feel like I missed the land of milk and honey and instead wound up in the land of beer and pizza. And yet, I think I'm happier here.
Nothing says I love you as your fiancé bringing back home your drunk brother from his own stag party
look for me at the Giants game I will possibly be the drunk girl passed out by 2nd
This is the fifth time tonight that girl has taken off my pants. Take me home. Now.
I can’t believe you’re letting her use the Mercedes
It seemed like a better idea while she was giving me a hand job. It’s a good thing we weren’t having sex. Who knows what I would agree to during sex
Randomize
