i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
he was wearing 3D glasses the whole time.
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
You're surprisingly coherent for someone who thinks her couch is breathing.
You broke into someone's house and stole a pan of lasagna.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
so I am that guy with the red solo cup in class. someone has to step it up.
And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
About the whale....I wasn't completely awake.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I need to take my iPad to the Apple store (when this is all over). Do I need to delete all my dick pics/videos or are they used to stumbling across that sort of thing?
Randomize
