two pink lines on a pregnancy test is bad, isn't it?
only if you didn't want to fuck up your life.
if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
i'm at the st pattys day thing. the bar is packed. they just put on celine dion its all coming back to me now. i'm screaming the words.
it's 1 pm.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
You kept saying thank you to the automatic toilet as it flushed your puke.
Dude. Apparently I just smoked some stuff that's used for Nigerian spirit quests.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Everyone else in class agrees the weed smell is coming from me
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
Mom got high last night and started crying because she feels bad for Paula Deen. This is my family.
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize
