how do i tell him I'm always in the mood without sounding like a slut?
im swimming of confusion and bacardi. where do i go from herrrrrre
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
I need a pic of your cock for our cock collage
We knew it was a good time to leave when you spilt the salsa on the ground and were trying to put it back in the jar with your hands
Lets have the type of night where its 5am and one of us has definitely punched someone who has been on a Disney Channel show.
I almost died in that meeting. Nearly dried up and blew away in the pure powder form of boredom
I know that feel bro
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
We need to step in, this can't continue. The guy she went home with last night looked exactly like Count Olaf, right down to the unibrow.
Which version tho, Jim Carrey or Neil Patrick Harris?
THAT DOESN'T FUCKING MATTER, YOU DON'T FUCK COUNT OLAF!!!
i spent most of my hangover doing the math to figure out the last of the alcohol would be metabolized from my system.
thank you pre-med degree.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
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