TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
he mailed me a thank you note for the blowjob.
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
uhh when the x-ray tec was moving your head you licked his hand and meowed.. i think he knew you weren't sober
Do you know how to give stiches?
I do not...this text concerns me
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
New rule. If he's too busy to put the "H" in "what" then I'm too busy to put his D in me.
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
