Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
A female Wisconsin fan just headbutted the bouncer. Im deeply terrified and oddly aroused at the same time.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
Didn't pick classes because we were out all weekend...only open course is "alcohol and drug problems". Fucking ironic.
Went home with a dude from UF last night. Just dripped chicken onto my phone and then licked it off. Going to pick up a bridesmaid dress. Mid 20s in a nutshell.
I got hella high today and freaked out about life and interest rates
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
I'm a mess. I mean I almost got off but I'm a fucking rubics cube down there so il givenhim the point
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