I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
Why does it always sting when I'm breaking the seal taking a piss?
b/c u have herpes
No i said "always", not "since 2003" Asshole.
Just boiled hotdogs in bongwater. NOT a good idea.
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
The best was having to tell my 16y/o cuz and her bf that we could see him fingering her in the inner tube. Lucky for them, I'm the cool cousin... and was river-level fuckedup.
I want a vodka facial right about now. I'm talking about straight vodka bukkake
i think the doormans mad at me
well we haven't pretended to pretend we were going to have a threesome with him for a while...
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
I can affiliate each flavor of Copenhagen to a different one night stand. I really love Texas.
You need a sexual gate keeper
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
Who died my cat blue again?
I cannot belive our party caught on fire
Randomize
