oh btw spread eagle is not an appropriate phrase to use in a scientific presentation. learned that the hard way
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Chillin with my Grandpa and my grandma tells us there is a tornado warning. My grandpa then says "We'll go hang out in the basement, we can bring the keg with us." This is why I love coming home
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Last thing I remember was wondering why there was a mirror on the wall behind the urinal and then realizing I was pissing in the sink.
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
nothing like smoking out of your roommate's bong with your mom to celebrate the rising of christ
he is risen halelujah
She's dressed as a slutty goth schoolgirl. Those are my three favorite things. God himself could not give me whiskey dick.
note to self: shower sex when you have 7 stitches in your leg is never a good idea. never.
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
Yeah started playing at the wedding last night, when the line. "Ludacris fills cups like DD" he starts pointing at my tits right in front of his grandparents.
My mom just said she had more presents to wrap, so I should "smoke some weed & go back to bed"... She really is Santa Claus
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
Randomize
