whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
And Anthony pissed on himself at the strip club
He kept saying the best defense against a lion is to punch it in the throat.
Let's just say for some reason we thought it was okay to make a burrito smoothie.
Just threw up in the garbage can outside the liquor store... I'm pretty sure that's some sort of distress signal.
I cant yet im literally covered in lube but I will later
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
I just did a drunk experiment to find out what it looks like when you turn a burner on the stove on while wearing night-vision goggles. I may be blind in my right eye now.
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
i've now hooked up with two guys who have tattoos of their sister's names...so that's a reality i have to live with...
I can't tell if you're talking about my pussy or Cape Cod.
He's so sweet...I can't see him enjoying that I got injured during sex.
I'm smoking and watching the Muppets Treasure Island. Where are you?
Something about that statement reminds me just how much of a role model you are, sis.
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Randomize
