i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
I dont remember anything after Tequila & Apple Juice. May have disovered the recipe for mental bleach.
We have literally factored in $2200 for bail money in the budget. This vegas trip will be out of hand. We are signing confidentiality contracts.
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I drunkenly asked a stripper to join our volleyball team.
I would totes be making out with random people in the name of america if I was at the white house right now
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I would feel worse for you if you weren't waking up between a pair of double Fs that attached to a classically trained chief. Im still jacking off eating hot pockets.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
If you are refering to the duckling living in your bath...I can explain, but before I do, can you throw a peice of bread in there?
I had to ask my mom to look for my kegle ball...
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