is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I know she is the girl of my dreams bc she orgasmed, rolled over and then asked if I knew that Orlando beat Cleveland.
:O -> O: ... that's emoticon for "he threw up in my mouth while we were making out"
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
Apparently I yelled "no stop it" in my sleep last night when he tried to cuddle with me.
Oops, guess its official. I just use him for sex.
I was told my cock was a religious experience.
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
but I'm still not sure how you became more and more fluent in Spanish the drunker you got
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
The sex would be better if it wasn’t interrupted because his home detention ankle monitor needed charging. At least I know he’s not cheating on me
Do you even hear yourself?
Randomize
