You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
I just made this asian woman on the boardwalk that was giving 20 dollar massages upset after I asked her if a happy ending comes with it.
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
If I start taking birth control 8 days after we had sex do you think it'll stop the baby from being made?
It's the eternal vodka... it never seems to go away
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Things I can say. There is a photo of me pouring whipped cream into a midgets mouth.
Can we please get through at least one night out when you DON'T threaten to have sex with one of my parents?!?!
you said I shouldn't try to fill the void in my meaningless life with dicks but i am trying and it totally works
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
I got blackout last night and applied to be a banker
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
i just read a article called "Booze, Drugs, and Bipolar Disorder"... i think someone is writing the memoirs of my life
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