i just told my boss to make it rain at camelot later...what is wrong with me?
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
Balcony sex scratched the shit out of my phone. Whups.
I probably wouldn't hook up with him if I had to deal with more than his penis. i think cumulatively we are up to a minute of actual conversation this week.
getting kicked in the face by someone doing a keg stand. just my luck
I actually want to hang out with her with our clothes on. That's a big step up for me.
buying new sheets for when my mom visits. I can't in good conscious let her use the ones from last night
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
Who is he, asking me if im dtf without a question mark
...
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
He invites me over for to adderall and chill. Academic Tuesday
Randomize
