Is it weird that I have contacts who i've classified as DO NOT ANSWER?
Lol no its called college
Needless to say Beer Gardens severly frowns upon playing flip cups with real glasses.
And then she started grabbing onto random guys legs, asking their names, and if they wanted to be friends... Haha, I love when the girls my ex's are dating are total drunken whores.
dear roomies, would anyone wanna donate the booze they left in the fridge over break to the "your roomies snowed in and all alone" fund?
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
For our final psych experiment, we're conditioning Tim to hump the nearest inanimate object and/or person every time he hears a Ke$ha song
After the 3rd time his brother walked in on us I asked "Does he ever knock?" his reply "This is his room"... Turns out he didn't even live there... I feel like a hoe.
You must be buzzed on Miller Lite.. Zen master advice is flowing
He cried & told me I reminded him off his mother. I don't want to talk about it. I want to drink about it.
I want to bone him until his eyes fall out
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
let me assure you that a rugburn on your forehead is the worst side effect of tequila i have experienced to date.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
tell me about the fingering
Randomize
