Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
so exactly what does one wear to an abortion clinic?
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
when I was too drunk to walk on my own two feet, he stole a shopping cart from the grocery store at the corner and proceeded to wheel me back to my apartment.
Then he tucked me in, gave me a goodnight kiss and slept on my sofa. I woke up this morning and he was making waffles.
he is a god among men.
My arms are hairy. And so Is my left leg. Just my left leg, the right is smooth.
The little girl I babysit saw pink plastic shot glasses in my car and asked what they were for and I told her they were princess teacups.
Next time we include dessert condiments into our sex life we can fuck up my sheets. It's only fair.
I wore wrist and ankle weights while we had sex. Does that count as working out?
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
i out mim tonsoeep
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