Barsexuality is the new black.
Who pooed in my magic bullet?
Sorry the bathroom was being used.
LETS GET FUCKED UP IN ONESIES TONIGHT.
I worry about you sometimes...
party gras won. party gras always wins.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
No seriously stop! I feel bad for him. It isn't even big enough to make fun of. It's so small that it's like a disability.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
The number of males in the usa getting circumsized are decreasing. Keep this in mind when we become cougars
Serious questions. Who is that girl? Why is she wearing a tiara? And why does she keep asking about penis piercings?
Regardless of age or alcohol consumption, the knowledge that my dad spanks my mom sexually has the very real potential to fuck my shit up.
If you got me high enough to laugh at a ceiling fan until I shat my pants you should at least have the decency to buy me another pair
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
okay i know we havent talked for like weeks but i just really wanted to tell you that i miss your dick. like alot.
whose this? and thank you
Honestly his girlfriend says she hates me cause she thinks im trying to get him to cheat on her with me...she should hate me cause i already accomplished that.
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