my soul wont recognize me after tonight
i hate this light. i wouldnt even hook up with me in this light
i was thoroughly upset that he did not want to be my number 16, who passes that number up?
His pick up line was "your one sexy pumpkin, I'd love to carve." Why would you let me go home with him?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
i looked at my phone & had a message that said "tell your friend she needs to clean my livingroom, i dont appreciate her trying to turn it into a bubblebath." I give you probs.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I'm laying here half naked telling him I'm eating gold fish to change the subject of hookin up cuz I don't wanna put pants on
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Nope. I've found you care about two things in life: your momma and spreading your seed.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
My roommate is fucking his gf in the shower and i really have to pee do i just bust in or pee on his bed
There is a guy down by the river wearing a zebra print speedo and a sombrero, with a beer in each hand, screaming "This is America bitches!"
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
Randomize
