try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
And then you told your sister how horrible of a friend I was because I couldn't get you cheese fries...
Just took a beer bong out of snuffaluffagus's trunk. Your move
dude im at a party with a bunch of 17 year old gilrs this is awesome
no its not leave
Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
I was just informed that you are the reason for my 2 missing front teeth.
It's stupid hot. I just want to be laying in a bathtub full of margaritas
The shit I just took was my body's way of telling me bourbon and mixed nuts aren't an appropriate dinner. Well played, colon. WELL. PLAYED.
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
Woke up with 5 texts apologizing from a number I named "guy who elbowed me in face"
The magnum condom fits. I feel like a manly version of cinderella
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
Im getting out of handcuffs then i'll give you a call
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
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