and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
Quick question... Can I call you daddy? Or would that just really made the whole 8 year age gap a bigger deal...?
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
see these eyes, they just want to bone and go to sleep.
I needed to do something spontaneous, and since no one had coke this was the next best thing.
it's like if youve been living with the grinch for 15 yrs and then santa shows up with a big gift begging to fuck the christmas spirit back into you. no one can say no to santa.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
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