ahhh, you guys look like a cute little family in the cop car!
At Bonnaroo. Just saw a couple emerge from a port-a-potty. Romantic?
you went through ur friends list and posted an obscene comment on every ultrasound pic...."not his" "looks like a sea monkey"
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
Oh yeah forgot to mention that I referred to myself as the oral sex heavyweight champion last night
Is it acceptable I'm laying in bed drinking airplane bottles?
In our world? Yes, but I'm disappointed yoiu are wasting airplane bottles. Save them for sneaky occasions
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
well smoking weed has become a deal breaker for me so I pretty much use "let's go smoke a blunt" as an icebreaker
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
It's 5am and I have yet to fall asleep. At what point do we just accept that I run on vodka?
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
according to the calendar even that i put in my phone last night, i'm supposed to fuck shit up at 11am today... i really hope i didn't miss something important
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
Randomize
