Reason #3 women are better than men: texting and peeing simultaneously. Write THAT in the fucking snow.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
Do I buy ice cream sandwiches or a 40? these are the difficult life decisions I am faced with.
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
No, pictures of your dick will not make me feel better about my grandmother having a brain tumor.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
But he has cupcakes AND I'm guaranteed an orgasm. .. I feel like I shouldn't even have to actually make a decision here.
I can only rely on you and Taco Bell
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
Let's be honest, college orientation is going to be "here's how to drink everclear"
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Hi I am on my way. I stopped and got the cheeseburger you asked for. Are you gonna pay me back?
Who is this?
Randomize
