What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
i think i was tempted to text while we were making out. like i remember holding my phone up behind his head and just staring at it.
My lips are sealed. Both pairs.
There was an ice luge. Lets just leave it at that.
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
My new best friend is the drag queen who works at mcdonalds and doesnt judge me during my walk of shame coffee break
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
A big dick and how quickly they respond to snapchat is all I look for in a guy
I tried to break it off with the married one. He offered to pay off my car.
The side bitch struggle is real.
Oh hell no my vagina is on that screenshot
Didn't think the day of being the oldest in a club would be when I'm twenty one. Even the bouncer looked surprised when he ID me.
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
I'm planning our wedding on the computer and our threesome on my phone. At the same time.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Randomize
