She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I'm drinking bacardi out of her mom's eco-green starbucks mug and chasing it with her sister's "for track only" vitamin water. Hello suburbia
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
Walk of shaming dressed as a zombie hunter. This hangover feels like the actual apocalypse.
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
I love you.
Bad choice
Randomize
