the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
You just kept screaming "COME GET ME OFFICER, MY ALLIGATOR MEANS BUSINESS" while swinging a beanie baby alligator at him.
The whole time you were apparently enduring your pukescapades, I was singing very loudly in the car to Beyonce on my way to get a post-coitus Diet Coke.
and you fell through a lawn chair
Does going to a local bar count as taking part in Small Business Saturday? Asking for a friend
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Randomize
