Its like Laser Tag, but more fun because it ends in sex
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
can you pick up eggs and chocolate sauce on your way home?
what kind of party is this?
the best kind ever
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
We just took turns doing keg stands. 27 is way too old for this. Out of 5 of us, our best time was 9 seconds.
Yeah. I stopped her before she flashed the guy for a free slice of pizza. She called me a gentleman and then before I knew it she was in my bed.
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
"Do You Wanna Build a Snowman" came on while I was riding his dick. I had to take a moment.
I have a to do list for the summer and thing one is figuring out my sexual orientation
I think John will remember that birthday for a while. I'm still dying at the fact a stripper was hunting me down.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
Randomize
