im pretty sure one of the guys i was dancing with at graffiti wrote on my back "you rock". now feel like a danced with a 5 year old.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Oh please tell me that I'm sleeping in your shower and not the neighbor's again
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
You guys bombarded us in the bathroom and that kid whipped his dick out and peed in the sink.
At 27 it's no longer called 'slutty', it's called having a healthy sex life...
So Doritos and vodka was obviously not as good an idea as I thought at the time.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
This dudes playing guitar and singing outside our window and he's like "ravioli is beterrrrrrr than tortelliniIii cause tortelliniiii is shaped like fucking ears"
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
You're doing screenings before you set me up again- no child sized dicks allowed.
If I could go one week without being called a maneater or a spanish trolip that would be great.
I was gonna make a strong case for you to be my midnight kiss, but poptarts sound good too
If you could not mention to him that I slept with his best friend, that'd be cool of you.
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