I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
When he went down on me, I saw his bald spot... It completely ruined the experience
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
Dont be alarmed when you find the maintenance guy passed out on your couch. I didn't to explain why I was there so I offered him a drink, I dont know what happened after that.....
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
Look outside and see if the septic tank explodes when I flush this.
I need a hoe opinion
go on
Got baptized for New Years. In champagne and cheap vodka.
Well you could have stayed home, played house and got blow jobs all weekend babe, but we all have to live with our decision
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
i was too drunk before they even got here. i took all their phones instead of keys and hid them in the freezerr...im an awesome party host.
I'm studying. I have a really exciting life lol
It's hard to say that sarcastically after having sex in a movie theater
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
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