do you remember what downloading porn with a 14k modem was like?
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
I didn't think her British accent was real until I saw how fucked up her teeth were.
you don't understand, he speaks spanish and is tall. i have to do him.
Idk tell her to wear something sluttty. I have that one skirt I got arrested in if she wants to borrow?
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
I sense lesbianism
That's a weird power
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
Last night was a sign that I need to stop sleeping with any girl that can quote the mighty ducks
Specially the ones that look like Goldberg
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
But seriously like how many girls do you know that will do that on the first date?
One?
ONE! And it was was glorious!
Randomize
