it's business casual sex. like no kissing, shake hands after, occasional frequency
Dude if I didn't piss myself last night I dont think I would have woke up in time for work.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
nothing says new school year like ambulances and police road blocks.
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
This is to remind you the pizza is in the dishwasher birthday boy eat it before it goes on
I just told him he had gained a new brother. He immediately knew I meant the eskimo kind.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
If you don't respond in the next 30min, I'm going to assume your in a sex coma, in jail, or dead... All of which I've become accustomed to, and will follow the appropriate channels of notification once you notify me.
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
Randomize