her vagine was all disorganized.
i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
someone just puked in the library. they put up caution tape. i totally underestimated finals week.
it tasted disgusting. but i pretty much drank it in the name of science, and free alcohol
Next time you think about divorce, consider this: a hot guy just walked in and I tried to suck in my back fat.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
How was my night? He had a picture of his mom on his night stand and he yelled "Papi like" when he came. Fuck tequila.
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
He told me I smelled like peanut butter, pepperoni, and pure unbrieldled passion.
Where does dick fit into Maslow's hierarchy of needs?
Totally unrelated, but by the way I DO have one ball bigger than the other.
.......do you have the salami in bed? I'm trying to make a sandwich.
Randomize
