Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
My entire childhood was an ugly sweater party
she has over 3,000 tagged photos on facebook. dont tell me she isnt annoying.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
We fucked through the entire Destiny's Child album, it was a beautiful thing.
I know you're gay. But if I'm not getting dick, then you have to. That's what friends do.
All is fair in love and war and toga parties
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
At some point, I’d like to pretend that his penis is a popsicle.
... Okay, fine. But I don't want to be a better person tonight. I'll be a better person tomorrow.
And no one can masturbate with the sound of Bernie's voice in the background
I'm touching everything in your apartment with my penis.
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
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