Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
The strippers from this weekend suck at words with friends
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
I wasn't concerned until I realized he was using the vase my birthday flowers came in as a " big glass" for his 151 and coke.
I dont know. Theres no way you can be ready for the sex hurricane that will consume you.
Hey, if I'm gonna bastard a child and ruin his life, I'm going balls out.
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
I dressed up as a "typical white girl" which meant I wore my yoga pants and uggs all night. BEST. IDEA. EVER. Most comfy halloween everrrr.
I'm wearing the monkey suit out tonight. I hope you're ok with it leaving the bedroom
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
Where the fuck are you? I just got punched in the nose by a tourist
Do you think I could use my teacher of month Award to get free drinks?
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
Randomize
