oh there is nothing like the 1st beerbong of the school year
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
He woke me up by trying to shove oreos in my mouth. im ready to go home now
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Dude, she's just using you for your money, and Cavs tickets.
Honestly, what else do I have going for me?
You make a valid point.
you puked out of a dead sleep and didnt wake up
Do you think the guy at the front desk was watching us last night? Although we were in a public pool, therefore our tits were free game.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
This is going to be one of those "I can only do this high" classes
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
She walked out and announced that he was now part of our confused, incestuous, glorious eskimo family. I've never been more proud.
Campus is too small for this to keep happening
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
Randomize
