3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
I thought he was joking about bailing you out until I saw the picture of you and the sheep in the morning paper. Were those my boots you had on it
I don't think you have the libido for two women at the same time
I think you underestimate the amount of time spent masturbating
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
Omg. Some dude is jacking off in Kelly's bathroom.
Is it related to planting your seed? Cause I don't know if you have studied the development of a tiny human, but that is some complicated shit.
Isn't everything in a man's life somehow related to him planting his seed?
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
And. I know i am a gay man cause when i saw the pic of his cock his feet were in it and i am like what the fuck?
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
He hasn't touched a vagina in two and a half years. THIS IS WAY TOO MUCH PRESSURE TO BE UNDER
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
I mean, he'll either figure it the fuck out or set my apartment on fire. Either way, it will be entertaining.
Also I've decided to start stealing shot glasses after I do the shots. You in?
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