I thought I was at a rave until the paramedics started chasing me. You win again tequila.
you handed me your bra at the bar and said 'hold my purse'
His body is like Jesus fingering me while I eat birthday cake
btw, do you remember scaling that porch last night?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
He took shrooms and didn't want anyone to touch him. He kept saying he was a chip and he didn't want to break.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
Eight drinks in. Subject is fondling chips before eating them. Intoxicated texting has expanded from best friend to random guy I met in FBLA.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
I was told to keep my leg elevated. I assume it means to keep my legs on the air, it's like I was prescribed to be slutty
It may not have seemed like it to you, but I was very sad that I was cheating on my GF with you. I was crying on the INSIDE.
Pretty sure my first birthday present will be a pic of an 18-year-old's cock. And I am OK with that
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Randomize
