you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
You should've stopped drinking when you started asking people for bites of tequila.
When I found her she was drinking wine out of a plastic bag in a bathroom stall, staring at herself in the mirror and crying hysterically. Cabo does things to a person...
But seriously, I hug most of my drug dealers.
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
When God was sprinkling self control to everybody, he ran out and was like ehhhh she'll make it!
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just woke up and I don't really remember anything past 1pm. How much am I missing?
A good 10-11 hours. You got laid twice. Also, you out-ran a cop and played football with a lamp.
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
