it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
Why would he get rid of a girl with no gag reflex? I don't get it.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She just messaged me 19 sad faces.
Ifound a recepit for a hotel room in my sock. soo.. Ithink thats where my dog is.
I feel like I'm sitting in a sleigh of puddy. It's not a bathtub though because you need a sleigh to go down a mountain.
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
We woke up at 7:30am. We got a 30 rack, yelled at all the freshman shackers walkin back to their dorms, played a game of beer die, and boned all before 11:00am. I found my soulmate
For the record you were pretending you were in a rocket when you drove from wawa to your house. So like 2 minutes of me listening to you making rocket sounds over the phone lmfao
Hey! you should come over!
Who is this? The number is saved as "Sexy Awesome"
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