He had on juicy sweatpants and thats when i knew he was no longer a threat.
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
At what point did I eat out of your mouth?
I'm so used to throwing up its no longer a game of hanging over the toilet. Now it's just 'stand up, aim for the toilet, do my thing' then walk out
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
I never thought to pass out in a hotel lobby rather then paying for a hotel room until you taught me that's acceptable at the Hilton
She's either too fat to type, hammered or has terrible spelling.
he went at my nipples like a starved dog.
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
I paid off a credit card today. And I was tested negative for HIV. AND I did laundry. Honestly, I'm most excited about the laundry.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
Are you rolling a joint while doing homework?
No, I am rolling a joint with my homework.
Randomize
