You took my girl thats shot the Fuck out. You better watch your skinny ass.
That's barely a sentence. Who's your girl? I think you've got the wrong number. I haven't even lived in Alabama for 4 years.
Yeah, I do, I'm sorry. I meant 205 not 256. sorry about that.
Good luck with your revenge in Birmingham.
If i could bang her from 80ft away, I would
So as she is about to take the walk of shame she flips out. Apparently someone left a brown present in her shoes.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
This girl can open a bottle without using her hands and she's 21. She meets my standards
The difference between you and me last night was that I didn't remember getting into the cab and you didnt know we were in one.
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
the girl next to me was drawing sonic the hedgehog on her exam what the fuck
godspeed
Ive seen a birth plenty of times, pretty awesome like a bear trying to climb out of a volkswagon.
Fuck the system, do you have any medieval weapons?
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
Randomize
