Do you think they could tell I was high on that conf call?
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I just introduced him to multiple male orgasms. I love wine AND tequila
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
well when mom kept referring to my "black hole of a vagina" and how i devoured all the nuts at the party like i was a pro, i figured my stay was up.
Almost just got kicked out of a bar because the locals spilled beer everywhere when we taught them to shotgun.
Am I really in your phone as Asshole Jesus??
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"
So in my DUI class I had to write down 3 people I'd call if I needed to talk and why...they all want to meet you now...
I believe you can. But if you can have rum with breakfast then do that. Definitely do that.
Emojis can't explain what he felt when that ass dropped
She woke up with her hand super glued to the fridge....how the hell am I Supposed to get her off??
Her blowjob technique? Picture someone attempting to drink a triple thick milkshake through a Capri Sun straw.
Randomize
